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Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:00 am
by godzillafan1954
Godzilla: Birth of a King
Synopsis:
Spoiler:
Natori Yoshida, a young man seeking vengeance for his father's death, meets with G-Force to discuss a weapon he is creating to finally kill Godzilla: The Oxygen Destroyer. Unbeknownst to them, Godzilla is on the verge of a meltdown, an event with cataclysmic results. To make matters worse, Spikesaurus, a monster as old as Godzilla, returns to wreck havoc on Japan. G-Force Captain Yukijiro Nakamura is forced to make a controversial decision: to not engage the monsters until G-Force has needed weapons. With Godzilla's temperature ever rising, Spikesaurus' resurgence, and the lack of necessary weapons, the fate of the world has never been more uncertain...
Monster Bios:
Spoiler:
Godzilla
Height: 100 meters
Mass: 60,000 tons
Powers/Weapons: Atomic ray; super regenerative power; Nuclear Pulse; can absorb radiation
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Burning Godzilla
Height: 100 meters
Mass: 60,000 tons
Powers/Weapons: Spiral Fire Ray; super regenerative power; heat wave; Nuclear Pulse; can absorb radiation; Hyper Fire Ray
Weakness: Will meltdown once body temperature reaches 1200°
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Godzilla Junior
Height: 60 meters-100 meters
Mass: 30,000 tons-55,000 tons
Powers/Weapons: Atomic ray; super regenerative power; can absorb radiation; able to unleash a Spiral Fire Ray after being surged with Burning Godzilla's energy
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Spikesaurus
Height: 140 meters
Mass: 100,000 tons
Powers/Weapons: Atomic ray; super regenerative power; spikes all over body; razor sharp spines on its back
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King
Human Cast:
Spoiler:
Natori Yoshida – G-Force Rookie
Yukijiro Nakamura – G-Force Captain
Sayaka Yoshida – Natori's mother, Omori's wife
Hayato Takaki – First Lieutenant of G-Force
Takeshi Matoba – Prime Minister
Hideaki Raiden –Computer operator
Yaguchi Hasegawa – Computer operator
Daisuke Yamane – G-Center Professor
Kenichi Serizawa – G-Center Professor
Shin Higuchi – G-Force Soldier
Hitoshi Ichiro – G-Force Soldier
Satomi Tezuka – Super-X2 Pilot
Sho Natsuki – Super-X2 Co-Pilot
Takayuki Amamoto – Super-X2 Coordinator
Tsutomu Nobuyuki – Computer operator
Masaya Hatake– G-Force Soldier
Rokuro Daiki – G-Force Soldier

Others
Reijiro Suzuki – Super-X Coordinator (Formerly)
Akira Fukuda – Super-X Pilot (Formerly)
Kenji Ogawa – Super-X Co-Pilot (Formerly)
Yoshio Kobayashi – Computer operator (Formerly)
Ryunosuke Nagashima – DD-122 Hatsuyuki Class Destroyer Captain (Formerly)
Omori Yoshida – Natori's father, Anti-Kaiju Squadron Captain (Formerly)
Takahiro Kurosawa – First Lieutenant of Anti-Kaiju Squadron (Formerly)
Aliens, SDF, & Misc:
Spoiler:
Type 60 Maser Cannons
Length: 19 meters
Mass: 132 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with a cannon capable of firing a ray; able to move at 38 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

F-15J Jets
Length: 9 meters
Mass: 58 tons
Powers/Weapons: Flight at mach 2.5; equipped with a Gatling gun; seven hard points for missiles, rocket pods, and guided bombs
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Type 24 Tank
Length: 4.85 meters
Mass: 18.37 tons
Powers/Weapons: Armed with a 105mm cannon; equipped with 12.7mm and 7.62mm machine guns; able to move at 53 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Super-X
Length: 34 meters
Wingspan: 51.7 meters
Mass: 220 tons
Powers/Weapons: Flight at mach 1.7; equipped with Cadmium Missiles; Fire-Mirror, which can reflect atomic heat rays
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Oxygen Destroyer
Length:
Mass:
Powers/Weapons: Splits oxygen atoms into a fluid and then disintegrates the molecules, causing living creatures to die of asphyxiation
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Type 74 Tank
Length: 9.41 meters
Mass: 38 tons
Powers/Weapons: Armed with a 120mm cannon; equipped with 12.7mm and 7.62mm machine guns; able to move at 70 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Type 90 Maser Cannons
Length: 19 meters
Mass: 132 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with a cannon capable of firing a ray; able to move at 50 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

IJN Destroyer Hatsuyuki
Length: 132 meters
Mass: 3,800 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with a 76mm deck gun; armed with Harpoon shipkiller missiles; able to fire ASROC antisub missiles; equipped with Sea Sparrow air defense missiles
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

DD-122 Hatsuyuki Class Destroyer
Length: 130 meters
Mass: 2,950 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with a 76mm Rapid Fire Gun; able to fire six surface to air missiles; equipped with a ASROC Luncher; has two Triple-Torpedo tubes; can fire six surface to surface missiles; equipped with two 20mm "close in weapon system"
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

DDH-142 Haruna Class Destroyer
Length: 153 meters
Mass: 5,050 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with two Mk 42 automatic cannons; able to fire four Loral Hycor SRBOC 6-barrelled Mk 36 chaff launchers; has six Type 68 Torpedo tubes; has a Honeywell ASROC Mk 112 octuple launcher with a total of 24 missiles; equipped with four 12.7mm machine guns
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Type 75 MSSR
Length: 5.8 meters
Mass: 16.5 tons
Powers/Weapons: Able to fire thirty 130mm rockets; equipped with a 12.7mm machine gun; able to move at 50 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

Super-X2
Length: 35.7 meters
Wingspan: 54.8 meters
Mass: 220 tons
Powers/Weapons: Flight at mach 1.7; equipped with freezer missiles; can fire a Freezer Beam; equipped with Cadmium Missiles; equipped with Oxygen Destroyer missiles
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

DAG-MB74
Length: 10.5 meters
Mass: 105 tons
Powers/Weapons: Armed with a super-low temperature laser cannon that can freeze things down to a temperature of -183 C; able to move at 55 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

MBAW-93
Length: 13.5 meters
Mass: 90.5 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with two cannons capable of firing freezing rays simultaneously; able to move at 42 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King

MBT-92
Length: 16 meters
Mass: 85 tons
Powers/Weapons: Equipped with a large cannon capable of firing freezing ray; able to move at 70 kilometers per hour
First Appearance: Godzilla: Birth of a King
Reading time: 19 minutes 54 seconds
Words: 5,473

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:04 am
by godzillafan1954
Hyper Era:
Godzilla: Birth of a King
Godzilla vs. Megalon
Godzilla vs. Hedorah
Godzilla vs. The Sea Monsters
Godzilla vs. Gigan
Godzilla & Rodan: The Battle for Tokyo
Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah
Godzilla X The DNA Monster
Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:36 am
by GodzillavsRayquaza
It was fine, but there needs to be more description. No real description of where a scene was taking place beyond very vague general places, no real description of any human characters, and no description of the monster OC. It was hard to really care about the human characters when nothing about them was described, nor when they really showed any character beyond a general motive of “stop Godzilla.” Spikesaurus himself just sort of came out of nowhere, which would have been fine if there was any indication of what he looked like or if there was any backstory beyond “he showed up two decades ago, and no more info on that previous appearance will be elaborated on.”

I’m looking forward to where this goes from here, and if my criticism comes off as harsh I apologize.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:44 am
by godzillafan1954
GodzillavsRayquaza wrote:It was fine, but there needs to be more description. No real description of where a scene was taking place beyond very vague general places, no real description of any human characters, and no description of the monster OC. It was hard to really care about the human characters when nothing about them was described, nor when they really showed any character beyond a general motive of “stop Godzilla.” Spikesaurus himself just sort of came out of nowhere, which would have been fine if there was any indication of what he looked like or if there was any backstory beyond “he showed up two decades ago, and no more info on that previous appearance will be elaborated on.”

I’m looking forward to where this goes from here, and if my criticism comes off as harsh I apologize.
I totally forgot to post this drawing of Spikesaurus by godzilla1541:
Image

As for the characters, I'll definitely be developing them more in the next few. And I'm planning a prequel to this, explaining Spikesaurus more in-depth. ;)

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 9:46 am
by godzillafan1954
Deleted.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 7:15 pm
by SoggyNoodles2016
Good story so far. Needs some more description as others have said, but a interesting outline has been set up. Excited to see where this goes.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 7:22 pm
by UltimateDitto
I agree with what everyone else is saying. :)

Looking forward the the next parts

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 7:22 pm
by godzillafan1954
SoggyNoodles2016 wrote:Good story so far. Needs some more description as others have said, but a interesting outline has been set up. Excited to see where this goes.
Thank you! I can't wait to share! :huge:

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2018 7:23 pm
by godzillafan1954
UltimateDitto wrote:I agree with what everyone else is saying. :)

Looking forward the the next parts
And thank you!

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 8:03 am
by HillyHulk
The story is pretty standard. Godzilla comes and fights a kaiju that exists for the sole purpose of having an enemy. From the image of the Spikesaurus you put up, its not particularly interesting (pretty much a dumbed down Bagan). Fight was pretty good, though. Overall, it's okay.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 1:23 pm
by godzillafan1954
For the heck of it, here are some deleted scenes from the final fight in order.
Spoiler:
Godzilla Junior backed away as Spikesaurus pushed his father to the ground. The hateful saurian put his foot on Godzilla's head. Before Spikesaurus could claim the title "King of the Monsters," Godzilla Junior charged and fired his thermonuclear beam into Spikesaurus' face, saving his father and inadvertently putting himself at risk. Enraged, Spikesaurus marched for Junior, intending to murder the young monster. Luckily Godzilla arose just in time and grabbed Spikesaurus by the tail, stopping him in his tracks. The mammoth monster whipped his tail from Godzilla's grip and quickly sped for him instead, slapping Junior in the head with the appendage.


The monster king fired his super-heated ray at Spikesaurus, attempting to keep him down for as long as possible.


Junior stomped on Spikesaurus' foot, causing him to howl in pain. Junior firmly grabbed the saurian's arm and pulled him to the ground. The new king kicked his enemy in the neck and slammed his tail into Spikesaurus' head.


Spikesaurus grabbed Godzilla Junior's snout and drug him through the ruined city. Godzilla Junior's head flopped to the ground after Spikesaurus released him. The new monster king made an attempt to stand, but Spikesaurus remorselessly kicked his snout. The young king made a second attempt to rise, but the hateful saurian grabbed Godzilla Junior by the head and swung him overhead, crashing him into a building.


Godzilla Junior closed in as Spikesaurus rose. Godzilla Junior howled as the towering titan rammed into him and stabbed his claws into his abdomen. Spikesaurus lifted Godzilla Junior eye level, snarled in his face, and threw him atop a building. Spikesaurus walked for the young Godzilla at full speed, ready to finish him off.


Spikesaurus was on top of Godzilla Junior, unleashing hell on the helpless monster.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 5:13 pm
by Gojira21
Ah! Sorry for late response! But here I am lol

Now, for most part most of what I seen has already been echoed by everyone else in here and I agree with them. The descriptions are lacking in some areas, and story could use better transitions into different segments of the story. Also, I know said have a prequel story, but having no build up or backstory for Spikesaurus made him kind of underwhelming.

Now, with that being said, I did enjoy this story! I do think there potential here for this to be pretty good! just have to keep working at it and take all of this constructive critiscm and use it in future installments 8-)

Goodluck to rest of the series though sir! I look forward to reading them, its always a welcome to read Godzilla stories!

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 5:45 pm
by godzillafan1954
Gojira21 wrote:Now, for most part most of what I seen has already been echoed by everyone else in here and I agree with them. The descriptions are lacking in some areas, and story could use better transitions into different segments of the story. Also, I know said have a prequel story, but having no build up or backstory for Spikesaurus made him kind of underwhelming.

Now, with that being said, I did enjoy this story! I do think there potential here for this to be pretty good! just have to keep working at it and take all of this constructive critiscm and use it in future installments 8-)

Goodluck to rest of the series though sir! I look forward to reading them, its always a welcome to read Godzilla stories!
I agree, it is a bit lacking in description. Especially with Spikesaurus. If it wasn't for that picture, I'm sure none of you would even know what he looked like. And thank you! I can't wait to get the rest of the series up!

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2018 7:01 pm
by Gojira21
Your welcome sir lol

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 9:10 am
by Destorogoji
It was really good. And I actually like the light lack of description of the monsters, if you focus that style into a story with a little horror theme, you can get a very lovecraftian style.
What I didn't like that much was the lack of description of the general environment, and sometimes you start repeating the names of the monsters a lot. The last one is a minor comment, and I'm sure that will be solved with practice.

The story was really good, and I'll be following for more content, man, keep it up!

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 9:17 am
by godzillafan1954
Destorogoji wrote:It was really good. And I actually like the light lack of description of the monsters, if you focus that style into a story with a little horror theme, you can get a very lovecraftian style.
What I didn't like that much was the lack of description of the general environment, and sometimes you start repeating the names of the monsters a lot. The last one is a minor comment, and I'm sure that will be solved with practice.

The story was really good, and I'll be following for more content, man, keep it up!
Thank you bro!! :mrgreen:

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:28 pm
by GodzillavsJason
This story and possibly the upcoming installments need work.

I'm not really fond of how the characters don't really have any motives beyond killing Godzilla and one of them just doing it to avenge his father. The latter is something that's been overdone and can get annoying. It's just something that personally gets to me, because if I don't feel anything for the characters in a story, movie, or whatever, then I'm going to have a hard time getting emotionally involved.

I'm not a fan of Spikesaurus. He didn't really do anything to get me hyped for the story or his character. He just seemed like to be an obstacle for Godzilla, Junior and the military. I could even argue that he served no real purpose in the story. I am curious to see him more developed in this upcoming prequel, but I do think he still should have gotten some background information aside from him being an old foe to Godzilla.

Godzilla and Jr also suffered from this. Both of them were just there all of a sudden and the lack of buildup or reason to be there makes their impact on the story less effective.

My other main issue is how the main character was able to seemingly create the Oxygen Destroyer rather easily with no buildup. Plus, there doesn't seem to be any consequences to him building it or anyone trying to use it for their own means. There's no conflict in creating or using this terrible weapon, which makes it rather anti-climatic.

I will say the fights are decent, but like I said, this story and potentially the upcoming installments need work. However, I will continue to keep an eye on this and see what happens.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:51 pm
by godzillafan1954
GodzillavsJason wrote:This story and possibly the upcoming installments need work.

I'm not really fond of how the characters don't really have any motives beyond killing Godzilla and one of them just doing it to avenge his father. The latter is something that's been overdone and can get annoying. It's just something that personally gets to me, because if I don't feel anything for the characters in a story, movie, or whatever, then I'm going to have a hard time getting emotionally involved.

I'm not a fan of Spikesaurus. He didn't really do anything to get me hyped for the story or his character. He just seemed like to be an obstacle for Godzilla, Junior and the military. I could even argue that he served no real purpose in the story. I am curious to see him more developed in this upcoming prequel, but I do think he still should have gotten some background information aside from him being an old foe to Godzilla.

Godzilla and Jr also suffered from this. Both of them were just there all of a sudden and the lack of buildup or reason to be there makes their impact on the story less effective.

My other main issue is how the main character was able to seemingly create the Oxygen Destroyer rather easily with no buildup. Plus, there doesn't seem to be any consequences to him building it or anyone trying to use it for their own means. There's no conflict in creating or using this terrible weapon, which makes it rather anti-climatic.

I will say the fights are decent, but like I said, this story and potentially the upcoming installments need work. However, I will continue to keep an eye on this and see what happens.
You make very good points. I'll most likely be exploring the consequences of the Oxygen Destroyer in the next installment though.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2018 5:30 pm
by JAGzilla
To be fair, I don't remember the Oxygen Destroyer having any real buildup in the movie, either. Serizawa was just like, "Hey, come check out this thing I threw together in my basement!" Obviously it got plenty of appropriate focus once it appeared, though.

Re: Hyper Era Discussion

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2018 3:47 pm
by Titanoterror98
Not bad! I can see what the others were saying: the characters could use more descriptions, Spikesaurus needed more foreshadowing and detail, the transitions could have been clearer, the human plot could have been fleshed out more, and maybe go into a little more detail about where the human scenes take place, and maybe the history of this world and its Godzilla(s). But other than that, I thought it was a fun read! I like that you put some pathos into your story, like the little moments between human characters, like the military meetings or the main character (whose name escaped me, sorry) and his mom, or Godzilla attempting to protect Junior as he goes into meltdown. I also like the atmosphere you built up at the beginning, and the energy of the fight scenes! I think that if you can pay attention to your criticisms but focus on what you did right, you could be telling some good kaiju fiction before you know it!
BTW: I know some of the guys on here compared Spikesaurus to Bagan, but as I was reading, I couldn't help but think of him as an Anguirus offshoot. Was that intentional?