BJ Doggy is a black pilot. He flies around the globe, transporting spare parts for nuclear reactors. He has a fun job, he's very sociable, and his co-workers (namely a hot scientist called Roxanne Bleeps, computer analyst) have a blast with him. One day, BJ notices a big blurry spot flying past his plane. He immediatly notifies the near Artic base about this. When he lands, he gets told on by a scary army official called General Rage. The good general inform him, that no radar picked up a large thing flying in that perimeter, and that his "Bigass mutafuckin' spot" joke was not funny. Roxanne sympathizes with him.
That night, Godzilla arrives at the nuclear power plant and recharges for a bit. BJ says he finds this odd, because Godzilla is usually weak after fighting other monsters, and "there hasn't been a monstah attack for 10 skreeonk' years!". Roxanne says he shouldn't overthink this, and they both get a little intimate. Next morning, BJ is flying Roxanne home, when they both see the giant unidentified spot flying past them. This time it lets out a "scary motherfuckin' roar!". It also attacks them, causing them to crashland on the nearby Infant Island.
The Shobijin there warn them that Earth is in terrible danger. According to legend, the giant monster Megalon, would awake when Earth's balance was in despair and would probably destroy mankind. Roxanne puts the 2 and 2 together, and realizes the battleship-sized spot is Megalon, who wants to destroy mankind because Global Warming unbalanced Earth's balance. One of the natives calls Roxanne "very smart, and I like smart women". He then attempts to rape her, but Roxanne tazes him. This arouses BJ. The natives laugh.
Meanwhile, Godzilla is wandering aimlessly around the States. Oklahoma is the first to go down. At their headquaters, General Rage and their colleagues suggest "the big guy might just need a girl". Everybody laughs. BJ and Roxie fly in Mothra's back to the rescue. When they land, Mothra and Godzilla start roaring at each other. "Goodheavens, looks like they're having conversation!". The Shobijin are kind enough to translate "Mothra, the Thing, is trying to convince Godzilla to stop smashing things and help her fight off Megalon". Godzilla leaves. BJ suggests that the monster may see no reason in helping mankind because they're always shooting at him and refer to him as "one ugly skreeonk!".
Megalon arrives and beggins causing mayhem and death. Mothra is too weak to fight him. Roxie says she's got an idea. Godzilla arrives to save her fellow monster. The Shobijin declare "Ah, Godzilla has changed his mind!". Megalon is still too tough for either of them. General Rage "Normaly I'd send choppers and stuff, but this is just too fun!". Roxie arrives, piloting the newly created prototype battledroid J.E.T J.A.G.U.AR. "Don't ask me what they stand for!" she boasts. An epic battle ensues. The military at the base take all sort of MST3K cracks at what they see.
Mothra is knocked out, J.E.T J.A.G.U.A.R gets knocked out, and Godzilla is exhausted. BJ remembers his plane was carrying vital nuclear reactor materials. He asks the Shobijin to teleport the plane there. They agree. BJ then flies the plane right into Godzilla's mouth! The King of Monsters recovers, whooping the floor with Megalon's ass. Mothra then carries his carcass into space, while Roxie/J.E.T J.A.G.U.A.R give Godzilla a pat in the back. BJ then emerges from the wreckage of his plane. "It's only a flesh wound!". They all laugh, and Godzilla swims into the sunset.
Every film should have at least one animal attack.