A Problem

[Dragoon]

I'm wondering what you guys would do in my situation. So, I'll give you a recap.

In three days, I'm supposed to give a speech about Navajo Indians. I don't know much about that (I'm not even certain about how to pronouce or spell their name) and I was supposed to be working on this speech for the past month, since its supposed to ten minutes and also have visuals. I was busy working on a Godzilla monster stop animation (you guys will understand that aspect, heh) which got deleted when I downloaded a virus by accident.

Now I'm wondering how to get out of the stupid speech. I tried writing it, but I couldn't, so I tried getting sick. A kid came to school with some sort of cough/cold thing so I gave him five dollars and in return he coughed on my face three times, then coughed in my drink and I drank it. I think I got sick because I'm coughing a lot, but my mom says as long as I can talk I have to give the speech.

So I'm asking for a good way to get a tongue infection so I can't talk. I would impale my tongue with a rusty nail, but that'd hurt, and if it had something on it I might well, lose my tongue, so I want to be careful. Any advice helps. I hope you fellow Godzilla fans can relate to my pain.

~Dragoon.


PS: I go to a weird private school, so just to let you guys know, I don't really have "Summer." I have four three week breaks throughout the year instead.

[Legionmaster]

Have you thought of, you know, writing the speech?

[gigandude]

^lol but yeah listen to legion kid him smart and wise

[Malchik]

Na-va-ho.

[Dragoon]

^lol but yeah listen to legion kid him smart and wise

This from the guy who doesn't use capital letters, peroids, or proper sentences. And you, Legionmaster, your quote in your signature is from a guy who then tried to flee and got blowed up, so you got owned.

I'm looking for serious comments that help with my situation, like Malchik's. I'll practice saying Navajo a few times.

[Bret]

^lol but yeah listen to legion kid him smart and wise

This from the guy who doesn't use capital letters, peroids, or proper sentences. And you, Legionmaster, your quote in your signature is from a guy who then tried to flee and got blowed up, so you got owned.

I'm looking for serious comments that help with my situation, like Malchik's. I'll practice saying Navajo a few times.

It's your own damn fault. You have to learn to put school work before your hobbies. Also from that post it sounds like if you don't like a person's answer you insult the person.

PS. You spelled periods and blown up wrong.

[KaijuSapian]

Now I'm wondering how to get out of the stupid speech. I tried writing it, but I couldn't, so I tried getting sick. A kid came to school with some sort of cough/cold thing so I gave him five dollars and in return he coughed on my face three times, then coughed in my drink and I drank it. I think I got sick because I'm coughing a lot, but my mom says as long as I can talk I have to give the speech.

So I'm asking for a good way to get a tongue infection so I can't talk. I would impale my tongue with a rusty nail, but that'd hurt, and if it had something on it I might well, lose my tongue, so I want to be careful. Any advice helps. I hope you fellow Godzilla fans can relate to my pain.

This has got to be one of the strangest topics I've ever seen.

First of all, why would you pay to get yourself sick? That is in no way a healthy mentality to have, nor is it an appropriate way to sidestep the dilemma.

Second, I don't know why anyone... ANYONE would consider trying to get a tongue infection as a way to avoid a speech. Plus I doubt it would take affect in the time you want.

Third, I seriously hope that you were just joking about impaling your tongue with a rusty nail. What's the worst that'll happen if you don't do this speech? You'll get a bad grade, some harsh criticisms from your instructors/mother, or perhaps a firm lesson about responsibility. Is any of that worth maiming your body or risking permanent damage? This is just school kid. This is the time in life when your allowed to fail. Take advantage of that fact. You can't do so once you become a member of society, that's luxury you'll never have again.

And you, Legionmaster, your quote in your signature is from a guy who then tried to flee and got blowed up, so you got owned.

What does Legionmaster's signature have anything to do with this? He's actually giving you advice. What possible significance does his signature hold in this? What does it matter if the guy from his quote died, and for that matter how is Legionmaster "owned?" If I were you, I'd consider using this input.

Listen, here's my recommendation.
Try getting as much done as you possibly can within the remaining time. Just cram as much as you can, do as much research possible within the next few days. Get your visuals done first if that's what's necessary, if not, speech first. Just fill your head with facts, write notes, just keep at it.
And just try writing it again. You said you couldn't write it? Well why? What kind of excuse is that? You would do best to actually try writing it again.

[gvamp]

Start slacking now in school and you'll be flipping burgers for the rest of your life. I suggest you actually just do the speak do research. One of my biggest regrets is slacking in high school and not sticking with college right away.

[spinzilla]

Here's what I'd do. Skip school for a day or two and just devote all of your energy too the speech. At least trying to get the speech done may result in a grade that isn't a zero.

I know you're asking for help to get out of it, but sometimes it's best just to take the bull by the horns.

[Hedorah]

Heres my thoughts, get off the message boards for a few nights and do the damn research. If I can procrastinate with a project and turn it in 3 days late and STILL get a 100, you can do a decent speech!

EDIT: And if worse comes to worse tell your teacher your "sickness" will interfere with the speech, ask for a time extension if you are seriously overwhelmed.

[TokyoVigilante]

Despite your total lack of responsibility and not properly prioritizing, your best bet is to read a bunch of books and just stand there and wing it. Put a lot of emphasis on one or two things, then talk about those for a really long time. The suggestion of staying home for a day two two and then working on it for two days straight is probably your best bet.

[Spirit Ghidorah 2010]

Stop wasting time insulting other members on the forum and write the damn speech.

[Arrow]

Use the remaining time you have and write the speech. Figure out how long each aspect of the project takes. Do the hardest stuff first.

If you need more time, make more time. Stay up later than usual, pull an all-nighter if you need to. Use whatever chances you have in school (I used to finish essays in another teacher's class) - like, perhaps your lunch break. If you really need to (and I wouldn't advise this) skip school.

Or you could make use of the fact that it's Friday and dedicate your entire weekend to your project. That's two entire days, just for you.

And the next time you find yourself faced with a large project you can remember this incident and not put it off until the last minute.

... or you could be like me and procrastinate all over again.

[Dragoon]

Alright, Speech is two days away now. I'm in highschool, so I can't afford to just get a bad grade or improvise. This is a big assignment. If I screwed up I might end up like Gvamp or whatever. Ugh. I tried studying and making a power point, but honestly I don't have the will power to do it. I can't study, I just end up deciding to watch a few videos on youtube, then I open up Starcraft II and play for a few hours and then I continue work on the novel I'm writing and I realize that I just wasted six hours. I was going to break my computer so it wouldn't distract me, but I realized that I need powerpoint to do the visuals and I'm having trouble with that as well. Its really complex/

I'm considering just slitting my tongue using a clean razor. I wouldn't be able to talk very well for a few days, but I'd recover and be one hundred percent after a little bit. I would do it right now, but I need to wait until Monday morning, just before the test.

[TokyoVigilante]

How good are your grades? If you're consistently a good A/B student (or whatever) then I doubt this assignment will cripple your average.

If you already slack a bunch, then you're boned.

[Spirit Ghidorah 2010]

I'm considering just slitting my tongue using a clean razor. I wouldn't be able to talk very well for a few days, but I'd recover and be one hundred percent after a little bit. I would do it right now, but I need to wait until Monday morning, just before the test.

Yeeeeah....have fun with that...

[Dragoon]

I'm considering just slitting my tongue using a clean razor. I wouldn't be able to talk very well for a few days, but I'd recover and be one hundred percent after a little bit. I would do it right now, but I need to wait until Monday morning, just before the test.

Yeeeeah....have fun with that...

It won't be fun but I have to do something.

[Arrow]

Its really complex/

Not really. It's Friday. Unless you have to go somewhere on the weekend, then that's two full days for you to make up the work. I've written speeches in less than an hour. Admittedly not for ten minutes, but still. You'd be surprised at how well you work when the pressure's on.

Alright, Speech is two days away now.

So get to writing!

I'm in highschool, so I can't afford to just get a bad grade or improvise.

You don't have to if you apply yourself within the limited time frame you have. You have today, Saturday, Sunday, and a little bit of Monday. Study a bit today, get the visuals tomorrow, write the speech Sunday, fine-tune the details Sunday night (again, pull all-nighters if you need to), ignore your distractions, and by Monday you should have something. May not be the perfect speech, but you'll have something.

This is a big assignment. If I screwed up I might end up like Gvamp or whatever. Ugh.

Honestly you should have been working long ago. But you can't change that. You still have time. Make the best of it.

I can't study, I just end up deciding to watch a few videos on youtube, then I open up Starcraft II and play for a few hours and then I continue work on the novel I'm writing and I realize that I just wasted six hours.

Sounds like you need to change the environment you're working in so that you can eliminate your distractions. Or, every time you think of doing something other than your work, think about what's at stake and keep at it.

I'm considering just slitting my tongue using a clean razor. I wouldn't be able to talk very well for a few days, but I'd recover and be one hundred percent after a little bit. I would do it right now, but I need to wait until Monday morning, just before the test.

Sounds painful and unnecessary. Just make use of your time. I seriously doubt that you can't finish your speech in a day.

[GojiFan]

I know how you feel. I frequently stay up way later than I should just to get homework done because I procrastinate. But at the same time, I don't have any sympathy for you. It's all willpower, and the only thing holding you back from not writing the speech is in fact you. Trying to think of excuses to get out of the project just means you will have to do it a few days later when you get better. That is how the school system works.

As everyone else said, you have a full weekend in front of you. Get to work, and if you are serious on getting a good grade, you will.

[Stuckey]

Well, you have two options. You either quit bitching about it and just do the speech. Or you don't do it and receive a bad grade and not bitch about the grade you received.
But if you want to slice your tongue open then I say go for it.