Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

For the discussion of Toho produced and distributed films or shows released from 1999 to 2015.
User avatar
KaijuCanuck
Futurian
Posts: 3451
Joined: Wed Jun 21, 2017 4:12 pm
Location: The Milky Way

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by KaijuCanuck »

Godzilla x Mechagodzilla: Godzilla vs. Megaguirus if it featured an enemy kaiju you cared about.

(JK Megaguirus fans!)
Image

User avatar
Major sssspielberg!
EDF Instructor
Posts: 2226
Joined: Wed Jul 05, 2017 7:48 am

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Major sssspielberg! »

Godzilla Final Wars:
Godzilla battles most of the Showa roster, Leather Fetish men from Planet X, hamfisted references, 1/3 of ELP, wirework stunts and a synthesizer, despite three hour runtime he makes short work of all of them in like 15 minutes tops.

Also Godzilla vs the Thuggish Ruggish Bone Who Turns Into A Gold Three Headed Cow Charizard And Basically Everyone Else
Kaltes-Herzeleid wrote: Thu Jan 06, 2022 9:44 am I love Final Wars. I praise Final Wars. Simple as.

User avatar
SoggyNoodles2016
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 6133
Joined: Wed May 30, 2018 7:37 am
Location: My parents' basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by SoggyNoodles2016 »

Cashing in has never been this good.
Bugs?
Kaiju Ghostbusters.
Toho tries to see how close they can get to Evangelion without getting sued.
Same as above but now there's a moth.
The best clusterfuck that has ever clusterskeeronked.

Bonus:
Shocking! You'll never belive what this soldier went through to see his family!
And thus, a username was born.
How unlikable can we make our protagnist?: a trilogy.
Last edited by SoggyNoodles2016 on Tue Jun 26, 2018 4:56 am, edited 2 times in total.
Image

RIP Evan.

GojiDog
G-Grasper
Posts: 1223
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2018 6:16 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by GojiDog »

G2K = Godzilla Vs. Independence Day

While Godzilla takes a nap, Japan is terrorized by a giant flying bicycle seat. Also, watch as Toho takes vengeance against the American Film Industry.

GXM = Godzilla Vs. Starship Troopers

The answer to the long asked question, what would have happened if Baby Rodan hadn't hatched and wiped out Japan's bug problem? Also, see how desperation causes a nation to adopt the belief that artificial black holes are not only feasible, but a worthwhile endeavor.

GMK = Godzilla Vs. The Exorcist

The whited out eyes, becoming the vessel of lost souls, and it draws the ire of divine entities? Yes my friends, Godzilla is possessed by demonic entities and its up to the Guardian Beasts and the military to perform an EXTREME exorcism. Call the Vatican because its about to get real up in here!

Also, watch the touching tale of how decade long enemies, Mothra and King Ghidorah, put their differences aside and become true allies. Ghidorah has never been able to defeat Godzilla on his own, but with Mothra's help, he'll find the eye of the tiger and rise up to the challenge of his rival!

GXMG = Godzilla Vs. Frankenstein

Watch as Godzilla does battle with a reanimated corpse, brought together using new science and the bones of the dead.

Also, remember that episode of The Simpsons where Springfield foolishly spends money on a Monorail? Well watch as Japan tells Springfield to holds its beer as they put their tax dollars towards something twice as impractical and twice as awesome!

TSOS = Mothra's Class Reunion

The long awaited sequel has finally happened as Mothra is finally reunited with long lost friend, Dr. Chujo.

Also, its the Kaiju crossover of the century as Godzilla does battle with the cast of Space Amoeba!

GFW = Godzilla: This Is Your Life!

Lets face it guys. At 50 years old, Godzilla is not what he used to be. He's a little older, a little slower, and a bit rounder around the gut if you know what I mean. Everyone gets older. It happened to Arnold. It happened to Eastwood. It happened to Stallone. It was only natural that Godzilla would get the grey hairs too.

But what better way to give Godzilla the swan song he deserves than by having most of his old monster co-stars come back and relive some of the classic moments that made Godzilla into the star he is today. Ghidorah, Gigan, Mothra, Rodan, and many others have returned to pay their respects the gleefully roast The King on this special occasion.

And be sure to catch the long awaited reunion between Godzilla and his one time best friend in the industry, Anguiras, who have not shared the stage together since their much publicized falling out in 1975. Trust me, there won't be a dry eye in the theater when you see the Fred Flinstone and Barney Rubble of monsters reunite one last time!
White Male Genocide is necessary.

Kill all white men.

User avatar
godzilla98rules
EDF Instructor
Posts: 2057
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 3:21 pm
Contact:

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by godzilla98rules »

Godzilla 2000: Over-The-Top villain......

Godzilla vs Megaguirus: Godzilla RAIDs Again

Godzilla, Mothra and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack: Godzilla has major heartburn.........

Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla: "Alright everyone, CHILL!"

Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S: "Don't call me uncle!"

Godzilla: Final Wars: Aliens with temper tantrums
godzilla98rules's Digital Paintings & More: http://godzilla98artworks.weebly.com/index.html
GeekyAustin: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQloD4 ... EJpzdZq3ag

Resized Image Resized Image

R.I.P. George Root III

User avatar
Titanoterror98
Interpol Agent
Posts: 530
Joined: Mon Jun 04, 2018 8:59 am
Location: A hole somewhere in Canada

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Titanoterror98 »

All right, I always wanted to try one of these! *AHEM*

Godzilla 2000: Godzilla does Close Encounters

Godzilla X Megaguirus: Godzilla does Starship Troopers

GMK: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack: Godzilla does Japanese spirituality, socio-political critique

Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla: Godzilla does Evangelion

Godzilla Tokyo S.O.S.: Godzilla does Evangelion 2: Nostalgic Bugaboo

Godzilla Final Wars: Godzilla does whatever was a box office blockbuster at the time

NOTE: Does anything after G'14 count? Anyways, I hope you like these!
"Kaiju are underrated." - Me
"Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don't try to figure out everything on your own." - Proverbs 3:5
"The only lemon content that should be on the internet is Lemon Demon music." - The Dapper Critter(A.K.A. Also me)

edgaguirus
Keizer
Posts: 8563
Joined: Wed Jul 28, 2010 1:25 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by edgaguirus »

G X Meg: How to cook a giant dragonfly.

GMK: Godzilla fights 3 monsters, but is killed by tiny drill.

GFW: Put aliens, kung fu movies, bad acting, every Showa monster you can think of in a blender, and then mix.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

The strength of the vampire is that people will not believe in him.

User avatar
HillyHulk
Gotengo Officer
Posts: 1945
Joined: Tue Jul 10, 2018 12:59 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by HillyHulk »

Godzilla 2000: Come on, Orga, at least buy Godzilla dinner first!
Godzilla vs Megaguirus: Japan needs fumigation.
Godzilla, Mothra, King Ghidorah, Giant Monsters All Out Attack: A giant ghost story.
Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla: (Dramatic voice) We can rebuild him.
Godzilla Tokyo S.O.S: (Rapping) Please handle me with care.
Godzilla Final Wars: The only war that's truly awesome.
Always: Sunset on Third Street: The Godzilla movie that's barely a Godzilla movie.
Last edited by HillyHulk on Fri Aug 17, 2018 4:15 pm, edited 2 times in total.

User avatar
SoggyNoodles2016
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 6133
Joined: Wed May 30, 2018 7:37 am
Location: My parents' basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by SoggyNoodles2016 »

How unlikable can we make our protagonist 2:
Tomb of The Mechagodzilla-men
Image

RIP Evan.

User avatar
G2000
Xilien Halfling
Posts: 5463
Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:34 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by G2000 »

Godzilla: Final Wars (2004): A Japanese tourist in New York stops an act of police brutality.
gerdzerl wrote:DONT STOP G2000 YOU SEXY BEAST

User avatar
Gigantis
Sazer
Posts: 10492
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2018 12:52 pm
Location: Nebula of the Orion

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Gigantis »

G200: The monster king returns to fight his most dangerous oppnent!...a walking, roaring turd monster.

GXMG: Moral of the story, Black Holes are no substitute for insect repellent.

GMK: Three deities try to pull off the ultimate exorcism.

Kiryu Saga: Everybody gangsta till ol' man Goji get them 54 flashbacks.

FW: A movie written by drugs. Not people on drugs. Just drugs.
Image

A guy who randomly stumbled upon this place one day, invested much too much time into it, and now appears to be stuck here for all eternity..and strangely enough, i do not regret it!

User avatar
Gojirawars 03
Monarch Researcher
Posts: 375
Joined: Thu Sep 27, 2018 7:18 am
Contact:

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Gojirawars 03 »

Godzilla 2000- Hey, kids? You wanna watch a real, good Godzilla movie after the 1998 travesty? Too bad, here's a bland rehash of every Heisei film's plot. Don't worry, we spiced it up this time: he's GREEN AND PURPLE.

Godzilla vs Megaguirus- What do you get when you cross Godzilla vs Mothra 1992 with Godzilla's Revenge? Whatever it is, it's probably better than this piece of shit.

GMK- Godzilla gives everyone war flashbacks while a bug, a puppy (not the one that almost drowns), and a smol dragon boi try to stop him from doing so. Michael Bay effects ensue, despite the fact that the director was a devout pacifist.

Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla- Godzilla vs Mechagodzilla 2, but the monster roles are reversed and it's EDGY.

Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S.- Literally the same movie, but also a sequel to Mothra 1961 for some reason.

Godzilla: Final Wars- Don Frye and basically Goku/Neo beat up some aliens while Godzilla claps his entire Showa rogues gallery, as well as a skeleton boi (who just ends up being Ghidorah again because fuck you). Michael Bay effects ensue.

Godzilla (2014)- Oh, wow! Godzilla is finally cool and relevant again! Look at this fight scene they’ve been building up for the whole movie! It’s about to be so amaz- oh. Well, I guess I can sit through some more of Quicksilver being boring without Walter White...

Shin Godzilla- We must have a meeting on the meeting for the conference about the meeting for the meeting with the conference relating to our next meeting in preparation for a briefing before the meeting. Oh yeah, and there’s an unholy, demonic abomination of nature about to wipe out all human life.

Kong: Skull Island- Literally the only King Kong movie that isn’t a total copy of the original. Also, the cast basically makes this a Marvel movie.
Last edited by Gojirawars 03 on Tue Jan 14, 2020 6:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"The time has come, finally, to put our technology to the final test."
-Dr. Asimov

Image
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8S9Rq ... r78nzbs-FQ

User avatar
SoggyNoodles2016
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 6133
Joined: Wed May 30, 2018 7:37 am
Location: My parents' basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by SoggyNoodles2016 »

How Unlikable Can We Make Our Protagonist 3: How to Escape Your Child Support Payments With Spaghetti

Game of 100 Meter Thrones.
Image

RIP Evan.

User avatar
Gigantis
Sazer
Posts: 10492
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2018 12:52 pm
Location: Nebula of the Orion

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Gigantis »

Off topic but "Describe Shin and the Anime films"/"Describe the MonsterVerse films badly" should be their own threads.
Image

A guy who randomly stumbled upon this place one day, invested much too much time into it, and now appears to be stuck here for all eternity..and strangely enough, i do not regret it!

User avatar
SoggyNoodles2016
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 6133
Joined: Wed May 30, 2018 7:37 am
Location: My parents' basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by SoggyNoodles2016 »

tyrantgoji wrote:Off topic but "Describe Shin and the Anime films"/"Describe the MonsterVerse films badly" should be their own threads.
Do they though?

There's barely enough to excuse it. So far, we have 4 films for one category and 2-3 for the later. Easier just to combine it with Millenium if you ask me.
Image

RIP Evan.

User avatar
Mac Daddy MM
Xilien Halfling
Posts: 5045
Joined: Thu Jan 05, 2017 5:27 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Mac Daddy MM »

Godzilla 2000: The adventures of Adult Godzilla Junior. Shit, nevermind. No it's not.


Quote of the Year:
plasmabeam wrote: Tue Dec 05, 2023 3:03 am Hear me out on this. What if Godzilla is actually Suko’s father? In GvK when Godzilla defeated Kong and they were roaring at each other, what if Godzilla inseminated Kong at that moment and that’s why they were screaming?

User avatar
Manuelito Canelito
G-Grasper
Posts: 1294
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:01 am
Location: My parents basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Manuelito Canelito »

Godzilla 2000: An ilegal tries to bypass the strict anti-inmigration laws by adapting to the local government, while said government fucks up it's own citizens.
Godzilla vs Megaguirus: Godzilla The Exterminator, dial 7-15-10-9-18-1 to get rid of any pesky space-time jumping pests in your home.
GMK: Some Greatest Generations ghosts are mad at the millenials for being Holocaust deniers, so they resurrect Ed Sinclair in his edgy teen phase to destroy Japan, with only an alcoholic Creepypasta narrator, a man in his midlife crisis and two cash-cows to stop him.
GxM: Godzilla but if it were an anime but if it still were live-action.
GSOS: Godzilla but if it were an anime but if it still were live-action, except this time the protagonist doesn't have tiddies and instead there's other kinds of fanservice.
GFW: Some bondage-loving aliens perform 9/11 all throught the world with a bunch of fanservice, so Godzilla after taking a healthy dose of steroids must stop them. Featuring: The X-Men, a walking moustache, and a lil' kiddo and his grandpa hallucinating a donkey sounding lizardmen
All houses have the same. Roof. Floor. Walls. People yelling at you that they're calling the police because you broke into their house. It's only when you give them love that they truly become Home

User avatar
Gigantis
Sazer
Posts: 10492
Joined: Thu Sep 20, 2018 12:52 pm
Location: Nebula of the Orion

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Gigantis »

Godzilla: POTM- Angry boi forces innocents back onto destroyed homeworld with a thicc tree beast. Results are..as expected
Godzilla: COTEOB: Angry boi n' friends find metal from Robo-Pancake Beetle and try to use it on tree. Results are still as expected
Godzilla: TPE: Everyone dies except that skreoonking tree and some weirdo natives who worship sky fairy after being attacked by Prince Linguini and his pale slave men.
Image

A guy who randomly stumbled upon this place one day, invested much too much time into it, and now appears to be stuck here for all eternity..and strangely enough, i do not regret it!

User avatar
Manuelito Canelito
G-Grasper
Posts: 1294
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:01 am
Location: My parents basement

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by Manuelito Canelito »

Godzilla 2014: An uncanny valley worthy robot tries to imitate human emotions and reactions while trying to help Walter White prove that he didn't hallucinate the accident that killed his wife while high on his ass, and also to reunite with his incestuous wife and son and save them from two D-List Cloverfield monsters. Oh, and Godzilla also appears I guess.

Shin Godzilla: A partially cooked lasagna terrorizes Tokyo and cheats using Rare Candies to evolve into his ultimate form, with only Japanese bureuacrats and "You're not American, you're clearly Japanese" standing on his way. Featuring Japanese politics and Anno's liberal use of drugs.

KOTM: GODZIIIIILA...

GODZIIIIILA...

GODZILLA!

F U C K YEAH!

COMIN' AGAIN TO SAVE THE MOTHERFUCKING DAY YEAH!

GODZILLA!

F U C K YEAH!

NUKES ARE THE ONLY WAY YEAH!
Last edited by Manuelito Canelito on Sat Feb 29, 2020 11:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
All houses have the same. Roof. Floor. Walls. People yelling at you that they're calling the police because you broke into their house. It's only when you give them love that they truly become Home

User avatar
G2000
Xilien Halfling
Posts: 5463
Joined: Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:34 pm

Re: Describe Millennium Movie Plots Badly

Post by G2000 »

ManuJM1997 wrote:incestuous wife and son
I get this is a Scarlet Witch/Quicksilver joke but in early drafts Ford and Elle were indeed brother and sister with some slightly subtexty moments
gerdzerl wrote:DONT STOP G2000 YOU SEXY BEAST

Post Reply