Talk about, Review, and more regarding KAIJU PLANET
Link to the story is here: http://www.tohokingdom.com/forum/viewto ... 34&t=26620
KAIJU PLANET Discussion Thread
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TheTohoSociety
- Ronin
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Gojira21
- Futurian
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Re: KAIJU PLANET Discussion Thread
This needs a lot of work. The story itself isn't bad at all, actually quite original. That being said, there are some problems with sentence structure and some sentence running together. Plus, need try add little more detail (if possible). Everything was happening so fast it was hard to distinguish what was happening.
Also...spacing out dialogue is your friend!
it helps make things more fluid when it is less jumbled up.
Overall though, keep up the work! The idea of the story is great, and with practice you will improve!
Also...spacing out dialogue is your friend!
it helps make things more fluid when it is less jumbled up.Overall though, keep up the work! The idea of the story is great, and with practice you will improve!
"Monsters are tragic beings; they are born too tall, too strong, too heavy, they are not evil by choice. That is their tragedy"
-Ishiro Honda
http://pokemunity.proboards.com/index.cgi
"Promethus has landed"
-Ishiro Honda
http://pokemunity.proboards.com/index.cgi
"Promethus has landed"