Gravity bolts split the air, tearing across roadways and destroying everything in their path. King Ghidorah flies overhead, his hurricane winds sweeping the remaining debris around Tokyo, each slab of concrete, each wooden board thrown by the winds causing yet more damage. They smash through walls and windows, crush cars and other escaping automobiles, and collide with unlucky civilians. Again, Ghidorah spits gravity bolts at practically everything in sight, levelling buildings and even entire city blocks in one strafe!
Meanwhile, Gigan stomps through the streets, cutting through buildings with his buzz saw, tearing down buildings with his hooks, and crushing cars beneath his feet. Shrieking into the night sky, Gigan kicks in a window, and...
Gigan: Woah! Wow! Hey Ghidorah! Come here, quick!
King Ghidorah lands a few feet away.
King Ghidorah: Now what?
The cyborg points to the window he just broke.
Gigan: In there! It's... it's... a bunch of giant dolls!
King Ghidorah: Wait, what are giant dolls doing in there?
Gigan: I was going to ask you the same question. I thought you were the expert on attacking Earth?
King Ghidorah: In all my planet raids, I have never, ever seen a store full of giant dolls. Seriously, those things are human sized! Why on earth would humans make giant dolls? Maybe it's a special effect problem, and these dolls are supposed to be humans?
Gigan: Or maybe...
King Ghidorah: What?
Gigan: Ghidorah, I think I might have just kicked in an adult oriented store.
King Ghidorah: You mean to tell me that those things are blowup... OH MY OROCHI!!!
Gigan: I know, right? And they say these 70's movies are supposed to be aimed at kids!
King Ghidorah: Tell that to Hedorah, who goes around turning everyone in his path into skeletons.
Hedorah: Did somebody say my name?
At that moment, Hedorah the smog monster crawls around the corner, humming as he goes along.
King Ghidorah: Hedorah? What are you doing here?
Hedorah: I'm here to save the poor kittens of this city you're so recklessly destroying.
Gigan: ....You're what?
Hedorah: You heard me!
King Ghidorah: Gigan, I think this I should tell you that Hedorah here, has a bit of a cat obsession.
Hedorah: Obsession? It's no obsession!
King Ghidorah: Hedorah, how many toes does your average cat have?
Hedorah: Oh, oh! Normal cats have five toes on each front paw and four on each hind foot. So, that makes a total of 18 toes. Polydactyl cats either have six toes each on the front paws or five toes each on the hind feet.
King Ghidorah: See, I told you he's obsessed with cats.
Hedorah: It's just a hobby, you three headed retard!
King Ghidorah: Hedorah, we have a Godzilla Tower a few miles back strong enough to harden you in seconds.
Gigan snickers in the background.
Gigan: "Harden you." Hehe.
King Ghidorah: Gigan, you're not helping. Although I suppose "harden" wasn't the word I was looking for.
Hedorah: Drying out?
King Ghidorah: Yeah, that's the one!
Hedorah: And how do you suppose you'll get me there in the first place?
King Ghidorah: ...I dunno.
Hedorah: Just leave me be, and let me save the cats of this city. You guys can go destroy those maser tanks over there.
Gigan: What maser tanks?
At that moment, a maser beam is fired into Gigan's red visor.
Gigan: OW! My eye!
Blinded by the maser, Gigan crawls into the trees.
King Ghidorah: Hey! Is that Gaira in there, with Gigan?
Hedorah: Hey, it is! Wonder what he's doing here. Anyway, catch up with you guys later. I'm out to collect some cats!
As Gaira and Gigan continue to crawl around in the trees, King Ghidorah destroys the remaining maser tanks with his gravity bolts. But two monsters are coming to stop their hellish actions, and save Japan...
Brody wrote:Let's say I've been a part of the kaiju community before most of you were allowed on the computer, ask some of the veteran members of kaijuphile who Deoson is.
Ask all of us if we give a shit.