Discussion: PREY

[M.U.T.O.]

Here is the discussion for my multi-part story, PREY. Please give positive and constructive criticism, other feedback, and tell me what you'd like to see in the story.
Go on, do your thing!

[Noble Saber]

Very suspenseful. Nicely done.

[M.U.T.O.]

Thank you!

[M.U.T.O.]

I know. It's a dark story.
Did I mention the subtitle?

Spoiler:

Prey: A Story of Vulnerable Humanity

[M.U.T.O.]

Thanks.
I won't, Saansilt. There'll be light moments,

Spoiler:

but they'll have to rebuild.

[M.U.T.O.]

Part 2 is up.

[Kubo]

Not bad. If a little more emphasis was put on the emotional parts, the resonance of the story would go through the roof!

[M.U.T.O.]

So, what would you recommend I do? PM me, please.

[GodzillavsJason]

Forgot to post here a while back.

Anyway, as I said in the PM, not bad and this is quite a suspenseful story that leaves you wondering what could be out there in the darkness. I am also surprised to see this be quite a dark story which I very much welcome. Keep up the good work and I wish to see more of this.

[M.U.T.O.]

Thanks a dozen, GvJ.
Part 2 is in the process of being edited for some more additional stuff.
Part 3 is also in the works in my head, to be written out soon enough.

[Kubo]

Thanks a dozen, GvJ.
Part 2 is in the process of being edited for some more additional stuff.
Part 3 is also in the works in my head, to be written out soon enough.

Well hurry it up, I'm tired of waiting!

[Gojira21]

Well, somehow I overlooked this story before and I'm sad that did not read it sooner!

The story was laid out pretty well, I liked the dark tone this story is going with and the use of first person narrative. Honestly I'm not a big fan of first person, however, your story actually does nice job of keep the reader hooked. I loved the insights to the family as definitely tried to establish some character drama and for most part worked. Although probably could spend a little bit more on them, but sometimes is hard to do with first person.

Overall, this great story! I like how it is basically in mystery to what exactly the creature is and really do not see many monsters stories with the villain being a worm like creature. Keep it up!

[M.U.T.O.]

Thanks a dozen! This story, though currently in a state of limbo, might resume with parts.

[Gojira21]

Hey, that happens man. Heck, most of my stories have become on hiatus lately >_> lol

Best thing to do is don't rush any aspect of the story, take your time.

[M.U.T.O.]

Hey all! This'll be revived in due time, probably re-created with new kaiju and an altered plot. The name will be kept, but a new thread'll be created for the story.