What's your relationship status? (Relationship support thread)

[LSD Jellyfish]

Today was a good day.

[master_of_monsters]

I think I might back off, my self esteem is trash and I'm not really (financially & emotionally) stable either but I don't really want to at the same time though

[Billzilla1974]

Straight, single, and sick of attempting to mingle.

No girl I've liked has ever reciprocated.
I'll admit I'm far from perfect, I do have sub-par social skills, but I do know eye contact, personal space and to take turns during a conversations.
However, even when I do my best to start a chat & flirt normally, women will look at me like I am the black death incarnate.

I've often overheard girls say "He's/you're too short" & on at least three occasions "I don't date scrawny white boys lol". Hearing crud like this for several years didn't help my confidence at all.
I guess being 5 foot 9 & 1/2 guy whose toned/decently fit isn't enough huh?

I'm a human being, I just want a girl I find attractive to genuinely like me for once, and not look at me like I'm a clown or some Gollum-like creature who deserves to be ridiculed and spit on.
Until I meet a girl who is willing to put actual effort into flirting with me, I don't see the point in attempting to flirt at all. Isn't flirting supposed to be a two-way thing?

The fact that men can also be falsely charged with sexual assault If a women particularly doesn't like him is another thing that has turned me away from attempting to date.

I needed to vent this, my lack of success socially & in dating has been an anchor on my self esteem & feeling of self worth for a long time.

[Fish Cakes]

Straight, single, and sick of attempting to mingle.

No girl I've liked has ever reciprocated.
I'll admit I'm far from perfect, I do have sub-par social skills, but I do know eye contact, personal space and to take turns during a conversations.
However, even when I do my best to start a chat & flirt normally, women will look at me like I am the black death incarnate.

I've often overheard girls say "He's/you're too short" & on at least three occasions "I don't date scrawny white boys lol". Hearing crud like this for several years didn't help my confidence at all.
I guess being 5 foot 9 & 1/2 guy whose toned/decently fit isn't enough huh?

I'm a human being, I just want a girl I find attractive to genuinely like me for once, and not look at me like I'm a clown or some Gollum-like creature who deserves to be ridiculed and spit on.
Until I meet a girl who is willing to put actual effort into flirting with me, I don't see the point in attempting to flirt at all. Isn't flirting supposed to be a two-way thing?

The fact that men can also be falsely charged with sexual assault If a women particularly doesn't like him is another thing that has turned me away from attempting to date.

I needed to vent this, my lack of success socially & in dating has been an anchor on my self esteem & feeling of self worth for a long time.

ok incel. /s

Wish I could give some advice or something, but just wanna say what you're feeling is legit. For myself and most women that I know, don't actually care about physical appearance in guys as much as personality, ability to provide, shared interests, and stuffs. A cute face and decent body helps, but isn't needed. Most my friends are some sort of LGBTQ+ though, have a few straight cis friends I've talked extensively about boys with as well. Height doesn't actually matter afaik, I find shorter guys way cuter, makes me feel safer when I'm with a guy I know I can lift. It's adorable you put the half inch there btw! <3

[LSD Jellyfish]

Straight, single, and sick of attempting to mingle.

No girl I've liked has ever reciprocated.
I'll admit I'm far from perfect, I do have sub-par social skills, but I do know eye contact, personal space and to take turns during a conversations.
However, even when I do my best to start a chat & flirt normally, women will look at me like I am the black death incarnate.

I've often overheard girls say "He's/you're too short" & on at least three occasions "I don't date scrawny white boys lol". Hearing crud like this for several years didn't help my confidence at all.
I guess being 5 foot 9 & 1/2 guy whose toned/decently fit isn't enough huh?

I'm a human being, I just want a girl I find attractive to genuinely like me for once, and not look at me like I'm a clown or some Gollum-like creature who deserves to be ridiculed and spit on.
Until I meet a girl who is willing to put actual effort into flirting with me, I don't see the point in attempting to flirt at all. Isn't flirting supposed to be a two-way thing?

The fact that men can also be falsely charged with sexual assault If a women particularly doesn't like him is another thing that has turned me away from attempting to date.

I needed to vent this, my lack of success socially & in dating has been an anchor on my self esteem & feeling of self worth for a long time.

From experience, a lot of people want and need different things. Just because some people say they think you're too short, or scrawny or whatever, I wouldn't think too much. They're probably people, beyond superficial attraction that you wouldn't want to be with anyways. It's bizarre because I thought 5-9/10 was like an average height.

But, I think self-improvement is good. If you're scrawny, why not work out a bit? It's healthy for you, and will make you more attractive. Not trying to body shame you or anything, but there was a period of my life where I was in denial about being overweight and then I just started running everyday. Suddenly everyone was more likely to date me. I know the previous message is seemingly contradictory with this one, but basically if you can change something yourself about yourself, and it's beneficial to YOURSELF, then go for it!

I don't think men are falsely charged with sexual assault, and I don't think you should be afraid of dating for that reason. However, I agree it's good to be careful. I have met some people that genuinely have mental issues that you wouldn't want to get involved with. . Additionally, I've been more careful about what types of dates I go on. I've met women on dates in NYC who would have no problem getting absolutely plastered on first dates, with me not initiating anything, and that's a big warning sign. I've also been on dates and gone to clubs and other things wherein I've been groped and touched by drunken women in situations where I definitely did not give consent. There's definitely a double standard, but the mindset shouldn't be "I'm scared to date women". Just be careful. I think if anything the #MeToo era we live in, while providing a lot of stress for men, has also made people more aware and careful of their actions which is a positive thing.

[Billzilla1974]

ok incel. /s

Wish I could give some advice or something, but just wanna say what you're feeling is legit. For myself and most women that I know, don't actually care about physical appearance in guys as much as personality, ability to provide, shared interests, and stuffs. A cute face and decent body helps, but isn't needed. Most my friends are some sort of LGBTQ+ though, have a few straight cis friends I've talked extensively about boys with as well. Height doesn't actually matter afaik, I find shorter guys way cuter, makes me feel safer when I'm with a guy I know I can lift. It's adorable you put the half inch there btw! <3

Oof, those rotten slimy incceeeeels!

In all seriousness I know I'm not owed a girlfriend, I probably need to let go of the bitterness I've accumulated over the years, as well as not let others passing remarks bother me as much as they have. I guess putting the half inch shows just how much I care about my height...

From experience, a lot of people want and need different things. Just because some people say they think you're too short, or scrawny or whatever, I wouldn't think too much. They're probably people, beyond superficial attraction that you wouldn't want to be with anyways. It's bizarre because I thought 5-9/10 was like an average height.

That's true, everyone has different wants and interests, I know I do, and I definitely shouldn't have spent any time with people who would insult me like that. The height debacle is actually kind of interesting scientifically since it varies quite a bit by country, worldwide the average for men is said to be just under 5'10.

But, I think self-improvement is good. If you're scrawny, why not work out a bit? It's healthy for you, and will make you more attractive. Not trying to body shame you or anything, but there was a period of my life where I was in denial about being overweight and then I just started running everyday. Suddenly everyone was more likely to date me. I know the previous message is seemingly contradictory with this one, but basically if you can change something yourself about yourself, and it's beneficial to YOURSELF, then go for it!

I do work out, although not as much as I use to, during high school, I was close to getting a two-pack. I don't know of any gyms near me at the moment, but I guess it couldn't hurt to start exercising regularly again. In terms of weights I only have a pair of 15 lb dumbbells to work with.

Lastly, while I politely disagree on the impact of #Metoo ( I don't think the positives outweigh the negatives brought on by it), I understand what you're saying, I shouldn't worry about that when it comes to dating. At the very least I won't need to worry as much about an interaction with a drunk woman going wrong, since I'm never going to smoke or drink. Cigarette smoke is one of the few smells I simply can't stand, alcoholic drinks don't smell that great to me either. I could accept if a girl wanted to drink in moderation, but not much more than that, & I refuse to date a cigarette smoker. On that note I've never been to a club or a bar, and I'm not sure if I'd want to go to either.

[Spirit Ghidorah 2010]

For the record, 5'9" isnt short, nor is it an excuse. I'm 5'7" and I've had no problems with dating/keeping a now 2 year relationship.

[Destoroyah of Worlds]

^ You'd be surprised at the amount of girls who take height into consideration. I've had several tell me they wouldn't have dated me if i was shorter.


My girlfriend got really mad at me last night. Over me having ED that night. (I am asexual - it happens). She left all frustrated. I'll be surprised if our relationship makes it through this

[Fish Cakes]

I would never date a guy over 5'9" in retrospect. I need to be stronger than them, able to overpower them if I need to sorta deal? Both for safety and because I'm domme with guys I guess.

[master_of_monsters]

I would never date a guy over 5'9" in retrospect. I need to be stronger than them, able to overpower them if I need to sorta deal? Both for safety and because I'm domme with guys I guess.

being 5'11" I'm offended I'm joking

[SoggyNoodles2016]

https://youtu.be/hVdiowoKzTE

[HedorahIsBestGirl]

Some women may judge a man by height, but it's not as important to sex appeal as people seem to think. One of my best friends is only 5'7" and has had a steady girlfriend for three years, and alot of girlfriends before her. Another good friend is 5'9" and has more luck with women than the rest of the gang put together. My closest friend is 6'1" and has never been laid or had a girlfriend. I'm 6'2" and have had some luck over the years, but most of my shorter friends do better for themselves than I do in the dating/hook-up scene. It's more about confidence than anything, and confidence is something I've never had.

[master_of_monsters]

confidence is something I've never had.

same

[Fish Cakes]

I think I have a girlfriend now? Took less than 2 hours after first chatting online. I'm still processing.

Gonna video call with her in about an hour to verify. See you in a couple hours or 1 - 3 months when the honeymoon phase ends and she dumps me, guys.

[master_of_monsters]

So, if you're talking to a naturally shy girl and she lightly blushes while you're talking to each other how are you supposed to interpret it?

[Mac Daddy MM]

So, if you're talking to a naturally shy girl and she lightly blushes while you're talking to each other how are you supposed to interpret it?

By not being a creep and asking people and instead keep talking to her and ask her out.

[master_of_monsters]

So, if you're talking to a naturally shy girl and she lightly blushes while you're talking to each other how are you supposed to interpret it?

By not being a creep and asking people and instead keep talking to her and ask her out.

so asking for advice is creepy these days?

[Mac Daddy MM]

So, if you're talking to a naturally shy girl and she lightly blushes while you're talking to each other how are you supposed to interpret it?

By not being a creep and asking people and instead keep talking to her and ask her out.

so asking for advice is creepy these days?

If she would look at your post, what do you think?

[master_of_monsters]

By not being a creep and asking people and instead keep talking to her and ask her out.

so asking for advice is creepy these days?

If she would look at your post, what do you think?

how the hell would I know, I've never been allowed to try this sort of thing. Furthermore how the hell would I know if she's even a kaiju fan let alone a part of this community?

[Mac Daddy MM]

how the hell would I know if she's even a kaiju fan

Talking usually helps. Look, I'm not trying to be THAT much of an asshole here, and God knows I've been in your shoes, but going to a forum populated by a bunch of nerds isn't going to get you the answers you're looking for. The only person that can do that is you. If there's feelings between either of you, they will come out. If they don't, well, oh well. There's plenty more. Just don't start posting like that Billzilla1974 chap, dude comes across as a stereotypical bad guy on an episode of L&O:SVU.